It’s amazing the things you hear and the things you find yourself saying once you have children…

Me: No, you don’t get a chocolate chip for farting. Sorry, buddy.

Primo: My penis on da table!
Me: Why is your penis on the table?
Primo: Penis goes on da table! Hahaha!

Primo: I have a penis, dust like Daddy!
Me: Yes, that’s right buddy.
Primo: Mommy has a penis.
Me: No, silly. What does mommy have?
Primo: Mommy has a badina! Bella has a penis.
Me: No, Bella’s a girl, just like Mommy. So what does she have?
Primo: Bella has a badina…Primo has a badina! Primo’s being a goof. Silly goof.

I was at the mall a few days ago - just me and the kids - and was feeding Primo some organic cookies and milk while we sang songs. I was pointing out things like signs that try to get kids to spend more money, licensed character items that are fun but give money to the wrong people, things that are recyclable, things that could potentially have lead, BPA or other toxins in them and other things that we talk about in our family on a regular basis.

Yes, he’s only two, but it’s normal conversation for him.

I didn’t notice the petite lady following us through the stores until she spoke.

She said,

“I’ve been walking behind you for several minutes now and I hope you don’t mind my commenting on your parenting. I can tell from watching you that you are a very loving and conscientious mother. Your son is so smart and your children are lucky to have such a great role model. I bet you didn’t circumcise him either. Did you?”

I smiled, giggled a little, said “Thank you very much, and no, we didn’t.”

I was a little flattered and a little weirded out.

I’m pretty sure that’s the only time a stranger has commented on or asked about my kid’s penis.

What’s the weirdest thing a stranger has ever talked to you about?

While we’re on the subject, I’ve re-opened comments on this post, just for shits n’ giggles.

Actually, there were many. He sat and snuggled me more today than he has in a month. He reserves most of his snuggles for his beloved Daddy. I even got snuggle time with both kids at once several times today, and a couple of family snuggle times, too! (During one of which I was inspired, as you can see, to take a crappy family picture with the point-and-shoot turned back on us.) lIt was a great day for all of us!

We spent the morning with a friend and hit the chiropractor, Beaners for a haircut (forgot my camera…aargh…but that might be good because he sat in a pink car for his haircut!) and Costco (where I go broke weekly). We came home for lunch and a quick play in the yard before nap time. (Yes, he’s napping again! And sleeping at night! Knock on wood…).

(I really love parentheses. And apparently they must be italicized. Who knew?)

At nap, we do a mini-version of the nighttime singing routine I wrote about here where I just sing the ABC’s, one other song of his choice and do our regular “I love you SOOOOOOO (big squeeze) much” routine which, like everything else, he makes me repeat four hundred-ish times.
Me: I love you SOOOOOOO much, my best boy.

Primo: More Iluhyousomuch.

Me: I love you SOOOOOOO much, my favourite boy.

Primo: More Iluhyousomuch.

Me: I love you SOOOOOOO much, my kind boy.

Primo: More Iluhyousomuch.

Me: I love you SOOOOOOO much, my thoughtful boy.

Primo: More Iluhyousomuch.

Me: I love you SOOOOOOO much, my helpful boy.

Primo: More Iluhyousomuch.

Me: I love you SOOOOOOO much, my generous boy.

Primo: More Iluhyousomuch.

Me: I love you SOOOOOOO much, my intelligent boy.

Primo: More Iluhyousomuch.

Me: I love you SOOOOOOO much, my amazing boy.

Primo: More Iluhyousomuch.

Me: I love you SOOOOOOO much, my awesome boy.

Primo: More Iluhyousomuch.

Me: I love you SOOOOOOO much, my cool boy.

Primo: More Iluhyousomuch.

Me: I love you SOOOOOOO much, my great-big-brother boy.

Primo: More Iluhyousomuch.

Me: I love you SOOOOOOO much, my athletic boy.

Primo: More Iluhyousomuch.

Me: I love you SOOOOOOO much, my smart boy.

Primo: More Iluhyousomuch.

Me: I love you SOOOOOOO much, my handsome boy.

Primo: More Iluhyousomuch.

Me: I love you SOOOOOOO much, my wonderful boy.

Primo: More Iluhyousomuch.

Me: I love you SOOOOOOO much, my Primo.

Primo: Iluhyousomuch, my Mommy. (Big Squeeze)

God, I love being a mom.

I’ve been thinking about something lately and reading Deb’s post this afternoon inspired me to type it out just to get it firmly implanted in my head.

I don’t lose my temper often, but when I’m tired or hungry or busy I tend to get a little quite cranky. I try hard not to let my children (or any children) see this side of me and for the most part I’m successful. For some reason, I think most of us succeed more at things like this in public. My students at school have rarely if ever seen my cranky side. But why on earth would it be okay for my own children who rely on my husband and me for their every need to see this side?

I’m a very patient person but the times that I have gotten frustrated with my son and pulled or pushed him (a little too roughly, in my opinion) away from something (like the fireplace or computer) he has gotten a deflated look on his face that I can’t forget. It lasts only a few seconds and I always hug him after and explain as best I can to an under 2 year old why he can’t touch it and then we’re both back to our usual happy selves but I always wish it had never been happened at all. Usually it’s something I could have prevented easily. Maybe by getting off the phone or putting my computer away when he’s awake. I can’t move the fireplace, though. It’s when he’s hungry or tired himself that he gets himself into the most trouble. (Hmmmm, sound familiar?) But I’m the adult so I’m the one that needs to do the right thing for him. Easier said than done sometimes.

Not to be a Debbie Downer, but any of us could drop dead at any second and if I did I’d hate for my children’s final memory of me to be of impatience or of anything but love. When I’m well rested and fed I find it much easier to be conscious of parenting with love. I’m patient and try to use all of the teachable moments I can find to give lessons with love. I discipline with love.

I’d never hit my kids but a raised voice or a rough pull away from an “eyes only” item is probably just as bad.

Each time I praise my children, laugh with my children, have fun with my children or even peacefully co-exist with my children I am making deposits into their bank of self worth. Each time I am not the best mom I can be I am making a withdrawal, and the very thought of withdrawing from a child’s self-worth brings tears to my eyes. It’s not good enough for me that they simply have a positive balance in their account. That’s the bare minimum and I’m not a bare minimum kind of person. My goal is to make every interaction a deposit, even if it involves discipline.

That’s one of the things I remember about my mom from my growing up years (she’s still setting those examples as a grandma and her own mother was the same) and I will continue the cycle of love and positive parenting to the best of my ability. It’s a lofty goal, but I think I can do it.

New parents get SO much “stuff” and have to quickly figure out what to do with it all before they get buried in it.

Clothing, toys, bedding, paraphernalia…there’s so much of it all. Luckily, I’m addicted to organizing and my label maker is my favourite toy so I kind of get off on it all. I’m often asked (a) How I have time to be so organized and (b) Can I come to x’s house and do it there. First of all, I find that if you take a little time each week, you’ll never get totally overwhelmed by it and it’s a lot easier. And, no. Unless you pay really well, or you’re my mom, I’m not organizing your stuff for you.

However, I will share my ideas with you and appeal to the parents of the internet to do the same!

How do you organize your kids’ clothing? Other stuff. Here’s my method. Or some of it anyway. Please share yours in comments.

What about you? How do you keep it under control?

Tags: parenthacks, children’s clothing, organization, storage

I spent an hour or so on Saturday night weeding through the boy’s bin of upcoming sizes. I do that once a month or so. (Yes, on Saturday nights. Shut up.) I still had a few of the bigger 12 month items in there, and also pulled out all of the 18 month items. Today he’s wearing one of the 12 month outfits that I just pulled out, and it will probably be the only time he wears it. Apparently Nike is short and wide. He’s swimming in it in width, and yet I can see his ankles and belly button.

Baby clothes can be frustrating for any parent. Who knows before they have a baby which brands fit true to size and which are way off? Well, parents of the blogosphere…(that’s you!). We can help!

I’ll include a list of my opinions about clothing here, and you can add yours in comments. Hopefully we can help expectant and new parents to pull the right sizes out of the bin early enough that they actually get some wear out of them. Everyone’s baby is different (mine’s long & lean…must be nice) so be sure to let us know your baby’s shape along with your opinions. Feel free to include comments about quality as well as size. Also, I’m in Canada but over half of my readers are in the US and Europe/Asia so feel free to include stores and brands from wherever you happen to be. I favour indie companies myself, but will focus on mainstream brands here. You? Comment on whatever you like!

Here we go…

Baby Gap: For us, Baby Gap has been fairly true to size (slightly small). They fit our long and lean baby perfectly. the 6-12 month size fit him from about 5-10 months. I love the quality - everything still looks almost new when I pack it away. Snaps in all the right places, and very comfortable. We have pants up to 2T with crotch snaps, which are hard to find and much appreciated. Adjustable waistbands rock.

Carter’s: Fits slightly small, but very soft and lovely.

Cherokee (from Zellers): Fits slightly small. Sleepers shrink and are fairly low quality. Other clothing seems much better and also fits truer to size.

Children’s Place/Baby Place: Fairly true to size. The 6-9 month pants fit him from 6-9 months. The shirts were a little bit larger, but very close. The quality of the shirts was fairly low - flimsy, I guess, but for the time he wears them they’re fine. The pants were all great quality. All items are very comfortable.

Little Tikes: I didn’t even know they made clothes until last month! They seem to fit a little large. The outfit we got was lovely plush fleece with soft seams and a quality zipper. I really like it.

Mexx: Fits large. The 4-6 month size fit the boy from about 6-10 months. Great quality - they still look brand new after months of washing and wearing.

Nike: Short & fat. Great for the wider variety of baby. For the long & lean, buy at least one size larger than you think you need in order to get the appropriate length. Quality isn’t as good as I would expect for the price.

Old Navy: Slightly small, but not too bad. The jeans in 12-18 months fit him from 9 months and he’ll be in them for a while yet. Decent quality for the price. I find the pants better quality than the tops. We love their jeans.

Please Mum: As true to size as any we’ve found. At ten months, the boy’s in 12 months from Please Mum and it fits perfectly. 18 mos is slightly large, as you’d expect. I love the quality. I also love the sales. They have regular 50% off sales and scratch & save days in store.

Snugabye: I’ve found them a little on the small side, and have had some that seem high quality and some that seem lower. I love the convert-a-foot concept!

Tommy Hilfiger: Fits very large. The boy’s currently wearing 3-6 months in a polo shirt and in the jeans, and he’ll be able to wear them for some time yet. Some of the fabrics are low quality in the tops. The pants seem to be very high quality.

WalMart - George: A little on the small side. The 12 month size fit him from about 8-9.5 months. They still fit in girth, but they’re too short. Cute, and decent quality for the price. (All gifts, I have to mention that I refuse to shop there. Read this blog for a few reasons why.)

Walmart - other: Everything we received from Walmart (all gifts) shrunk terribly and fit for about a week. In this case, you get what you pay for. At 3 months, the boy was in their 12 month diaper shirts, and he’s not that huge. If you must buy from Walmart, buy big. And buy their George brand. Crappy quality, but I don’t expect anything great to come from Walmart.

That covers most of what we’ve gotten over the past year. Let me know what you think.
Anyone with older children? How do their clothes match up in terms of size and quality?
How about the American stores like Target etc.? Let’s help those new parents out!
(And, honestly, help me. I still don’t get it.)
I’ll keep this one open indefinitely so we can keep sharing the wealth of knowledge that is parent bloggers.

Come back Wednesday for an interactive post on organizing the plethora of kids’ stuff filling your home!

This post got way too long, way too fast. Please check the comments for some great information!

When you’re done, head over to The Opinionated Parent - there are currently five valid contests to enter, with more coming every day!

Tags: parenthacks, children’s clothing, brands, shopping

In light of the continual blogger discussion about circumcision, I just had to stir up some crap with my own post on the issue. So many people are afraid to offend other people on their blogs. Quite frankly, I don’t give a damn. I love mature, adult discussions about the most controversial of issues. So, lets have one. Beware: I will be sharing with you my strong opinions on the issue. I’m totally cool with it if you disagree. Just be nice about it. I have friends who have circumcised. I do not judge them. I do not think they are bad parents. I do not think their children are psychologically ruined for life. While I don’t agree, it was their decision and they can’t change it now anyway. So be it. This is my blog. This is my opinion.

In this video, Penn & Teller explore circumcision.

(Warning: This one made me gag. People do this to their sons. Still. In light of all the research.) This video shows a routine infant circumcision, in case you don’t want to take the time to watch the above.

But you really should.
It’s all about education.
And? The Penn & Teller one is really freaking entertaining.
Except the part where they painfully mutilate the genitals of a newborn baby.

Okay, I guess I gave away my stance on the issue. I think I’ll go with the argument/counter argument method. Please feel free to politely add your own in comments. Again, I don’t care if you agree with me, or if you even have a strong opinion. I just love controversy. (And I’d never cut any part of my baby off without some serious medical reason…arm, leg, penis…get my drift?)

I think it’s akin to female genital mutilation. It’s surgery. Unnecessary surgery at that.

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Watch the second video. Imagine them doing that to your son, while you watch. Imagine them doing the corresponding thing to your daughter, while you watch. ["But I wouldn't watch! I could never watch that!"] Ahem. Point made.

[I want my son to look like his daddy.] (Thirty years ago, this procedure was routine. Many parents weren’t even asked before their sons were stolen away to be mutilated.) (No, I can’t call it “snipped” or “cut.” Those are cutesie words. This is major genital surgery. Not cute. Not snippy snip snip.) My husband’s answer to that one: “I’m pretty sure we won’t be sitting around comparing dicks much. I have lots of great memories with my dad, none of which involve his penis. If he has a problem with his dick not looking like mine, we’ve done something else seriously wrong.”

[They won't remember the pain/They don't feel pain.] They won’t remember if you punch them in the head either. That doesn’t make it right. And to the second point? Um. Bullshit.

[It reduces the risk of AIDS. [insert STD here]] Not if you use a condom. Then it becomes a non-issue. Isn’t this what we should be teaching our kids anyway?

[You can't get penis cancer if you're circumcised. Penis cancer almost always occurs in the foreskin.] You can’t get breast cancer if you don’t have tits. Go cut them off, mmm-kay? While you’re at it, I think nose cancer is getting more common.

[It's easier to keep clean.] No, it’s not. There’s no work to cleaning a baby penis (unless, of course, you hack part of it off, in which case you have to deal with blood, scar tissue, pain…) You just clean it like you clean their fingers and toes. Nothing to it. It will retract anywhere between the ages of 3 and 13, at which time you teach them to clean it. No different than a vagina (there are way more folds in a vagina, actually) and we don’t hack part of them off to make them easier to clean.

[I just don't want him to be made fun of/feel different...] First of all, the kids with part of their dicks chopped off are different. Second, how about we foster self confidence in our kids. And maybe teach them a few snarky comebacks for others who either spend their free time looking at other kids’ penises or are interested enough to keep talking about them. That should do it.

[I'll let my husband make the decision. He's the one with a penis, after all.] You grew this kid. You both had a part in making him. These decisions need to be made together. Look at all side of the issue. Remember, we’re in a different society now than even 20 years ago. The mother’s instinct is to protect her children from pain. Not to pay other people to cause it.

[I prefer the look of it. I want his future partners to like the look of his wang.] First of all, ew. You don’t want to be thinking about your future son’s sex life. Really. You also have no idea what his partner(s) will prefer. If he {and I repeat HE} wants to chop it off in the future, it belongs to him and he can do so. If he likes it the way it is, great. If you mutilate it and he wants it back, he has to go through a hell of a lot to get it back. Again, from my husband’s perspective…”If our kid is obsessed with his dick and is comparing it to others’, we’ve done something wrong.”

[When he's really old he might end up not being able to clean his penis properly and then it will get all smelly and gross.] What about your unclean, smelly and gross vagina when you’re 95? Hopefully someone will clean it for you before it gets that bad, as they hopefully will to his penis if he is unable. However, NOT a reason to cut part of it off. What if he’s healthy and can clean it properly until he leaves the earth? You never know. You wouldn’t cut off all of your daughters’ extra genital skin in preparation for their life in a nursing home, would you?

———-
So, there you have it. My very biased educated opinion on the issue. I also should tell you that I always thought I would circumcise any of my sons, just because it’s what I was used to and I had fallen prey so the infamous pressure of society. When I was pregnant we read a lot of research (not blogger opinions; actual research) and spoke to many doctors about it and decided we would not do it for all of the above reasons and more. Then, when I held my precious newborn son in my arms I knew we had made the right decision. There was no way I would ever let anyone hurt him, let alone pay them to do it.

(more…)

From a rookie mom to the rest of you…

What would you do if your kid suddenly started waking up to play for an hour in the middle of the night? Lay him down, he screams. (And we don’t do that here.) Rock him, he coos and smiles at you with wide-awake eyes. He’s not hungry and won’t nurse. Sometimes it’s 10 or 11 pm. That’s do-able. It’s 3 am that’s not so do-able. He’s started “napping” at supper time and then staying up later, too, and is getting 3-4 less hours of sleep/day than he was a few weeks ago.

Thanks for sharing your wisdom. Now, go enter the contest and tell at least one friend about it. Pretty please? Maybe you’ll get a little ‘thank-you’ gift from Much More Opinionated~you never know!

(Oooh, just wait for the next review. It’s SO awesome. And they’re sponsoring a contest as well! If you don’t win, you’ll want to buy it for sure. I guarantee it. It’s not greedy to enter them all, you know. Go on. Just do it. All the cool kids are.)

I’m not a mobile person. (That sounds funny. I’m quite mobile actually. I even run on a regular basis. I’m just not a mobile person. They always seem so noisy - and maybe a little tacky.)

A few weeks ago, though, I found a solution. I ordered this mobile as recommended by the ever-awesome Cool Mom Picks. I didn’t order any cards (I was hoping to win them from CMP, but didn’t) because I plan to use my own flash cards. Being a grade one teacher, I have an unending supply - alphabet, animals, sign language… I’m totally excited to get it hung, but I’m not looking forward to putting a hook in the ceiling for it. Does anyone know of a hack to hang it from the side of the crib like a ‘real’ mobile?

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Remember craft day with my baby group? I forgot to show you the results! (You’re probably not surprised…)

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Remind me if I forget to tell you why I had a mini-heart attack on Saturday night, courtesy of my brother. Otherwise known as ‘he who needs a kick in the ass.’

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Hey - you should really go check out my friend Laverne and her best friend Shirley who are new to the blogging world. Funny stuff!

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Is this Pink for October a little more tolerable with the orange? I tried to change the orange, but only the sidebar changed and it was even more hideous, so this is the best I can do in a pinch. My challenge for you? Every time you come here, tell one more person to do a breast self exam! Have you done yours yet this month?
Happy Sunday!

As a prelude to my little bit of assvice, I give you Miz. S’s take on the topic:

Speaking of work, kids, and mommy-ing: I would like to express my opinion about the whole SAHM vs working mom thing. My basic philosophy is that people should do what works best for their family and everyone else should mind their own goddamned business.

But as I look around me at the people I know who are a) going through a divorce or b) OUGHT to be going through a divorce, I am more and more convinced that the woman who stays home with her kids for years and years puts herself in a perilous financial position. None of us expect to get divorced, at least not in the heady, early years of marriage, but it happens. Other bad stuff can happen too. You just can’t predict what your financial situation might be.

So go back to school, take classes, learn new stuff. Be able to support yourself if you are suddenly on your own at the age of 50. Either that, or have a KILLER pre-nup and/or AWESOME insurance.

And while I’m in the advice-giving mood? I know that summer is almost over, but some of you all will be at the pool between now and Labor Day, and I would like you to do something VERY IMPORTANT before you go there.

Put on your bathing suit. Look at yourself carefully in the mirror. IS ANY HAIR SHOWING? If so, please go get a bikini wax or make liberal use of a razor.

I have spoken.

I included a little more of her post than I needed to because guys? She’s funny!

On with the stay-at-home vs. working mom philosophy. My personal opinion on it anyway. (Notice I said personal opinion? That means you can’t tell me I’m wrong. It’s an opinion, people! Feel free to discuss in comments, however, and share your own opinions on the matter. I love me a good animated discussion.)

*Staying home with your kids is extremely valuable for their development.
*Having a quality babysitter/nanny/dayhome is also extremely valuable for their development.
*Quality time spent with your children is more valuable than quantity time.
*Having no pension or retirement plan when your kids grow up is not valuable. Not valuable at all.
*Having no medical benefits that come with working is not valuable. Not valuable at all.
*Having no sense of security and independence is not valuable. Not valuable at all.

We can afford for me not to work. It would be tight, but we’d certainly be fine. The BG has great benefits too. We both know how valuable our time with the boy is. I am taking a minimum of his first year off of work. The BG may be able to take some time with him after that. By the time he’s 18 months, we’ll both be back to working full time. He’ll be at a babysitter about a block from my workplace, playing, learning and being a kid. He’ll be the only full-time child there. Her youngest is in kindergarten half time this year. She also takes some kids for subsitute teachers and some lunch/after school kids. Bottom line on the babysitter thing - the boy will have lots of chance to socialize but also lots of one to one attention. He won’t be going to school with what we teachers call “daycare-itis” referring to kids who grow up in daycares so have learned that you have to raise your voice and/or misbehave to get attention. But? The thought of him being with someone else all day still makes me want to throw up. (Mom and Dad, are you sure you don’t want to move here? We pay well!)

Where am I going with this? Hmm. I’m not sure. Oh wait. I remember!

If I were to stay at home living on the BG’s salary and benefits, which is more than enough to take care of our family, and he were to, say,

a. leave us (which he would never do, but things happen that you have to plan for - you know, midlife crisis/mental illness and stuff)
b. die
c. become terminally ill or permanently disabled
d. some other really shitty thing that I can’t think of right now

we’d be royally screwed. Sure, I could get a job at that time. I’d be out several years of pensionable service, would be too expensive to get my current contract back and would be seriously out of the professional loop. But I could work in retail, I guess.

As it stands now, our then-toddler will have wonderful care for 7.5 hours/day Monday - Thursday and 4 hours on Friday and be with us the rest of the time. He will have parents who can afford to put him in whatever activites he chooses (which, to me, is minor compared to the rest), who can both afford to be independent should something happen to the other and who love each other and him deeply enough to have thought far enough into the future to ensure the well-being of our whole family - no matter what. We can never get these years back - these years with our amazing son, these years together and these years planning for our future. We’ll never work evenings, never work weekends and have all holidays home with him. I have a week at Easter, a week at Christmas and 7 weeks in the summer. The BG has 4-6 weeks whenever he wants it, plus 3-4 days a month in lieu of flex time when the boy can stay home with him on a weekday. Those times, and our evenings, our mornings, our lunch breaks together, our middle of the night cuddles…those times will be wonderful, quality times that we will never take for granted.

I have seen way too many people, mostly women, left helpless when left alone - by whatever means - because they didn’t plan ahead. I’m not saying all moms should work. I’m saying all moms should evaluate their situation. Think hard.

Is there any way I’d ever stay home with kids indefinitely? Sure! As soon as we win a very large lottery and have our complete retirement savings, no debt, kids education paid… I’m there~and there’s nowhere I’d rather be. Unfortunately, because that is unlikely, I have no choice but to be responsible. We’re still buying the occasional ticket. Just in case.

The Un-Assvice

Y’all know how I hate assvice, right?

Well, I love Moxie!

Because I have read, literally, every fertility, pregnancy and parenting book ever written (okay, not quite, but you get my drift), people often ask me for their recommendations and I can never get the words out to do justice to how I really feel. I usually say something like this:

“Read The Happiest Baby on the Block for some ideas on soothing, breastfeed on demand, snuggle as much as you can, ask for help with housework, get people to bring meals, take lots of pictures, enjoy every little thing and just follow your instincts.”

Ask Moxie, however has a WAY better response than I. She’s very thorough in her answer. If you don’t read her, you should. Those of you who are pregnant, trying to conceive or have babies, please read her advice in the previous link. That woman has something that becomes more rare every day — common sense!

The Other Stuff

I ordered the boy the sun-smart pool he wanted.
(You know how 4 month old babies ask for stuff all the time?)
and we tried it today!

The water was chilly, so we had to have a big snuggle to warm up after…

And, just for the sake of some additional cuteness…

What are your favourite pregnancy/parenting books? Why?
Which ones would you never recommend? Why?

Yesterday Ry and I attended the funeral of the 23 year old son of a co-worker. He had been crossing the street in a crosswalk with friends and family and was hit by a car. He was flown via air ambulance to a trauma centre and passed away there surrounded by his family. He was happy, in university persuing a degree in physics, had a beautiful girlfriend, a job. He had dreams of having a large family of his own one day. Of a great career. What more could a mother ask?

His 4 siblings and his mother and father all spoke at his funeral. It was standing room only and people were packed in right to the doors. The overflow, lobby and hallways were full. There was not a dry eye in the house. His family all read him letters that they had written to him. His father closed with “and as I signed every card I ever wrote you, your one and only Daddy.” That’s when I lost it. His mother thanked God for the privilege of being his caregiver for 23 1/2 years. As I stood at the back of the funeral home holding Ry in his carrier, swaying and bouncing, kissing his head, looking into his beautiful loving eyes, I could only cry. Cry for the parents who raised this wonderful young man and lost him. Cry for the mother who, for 23 1/2 years felt the amazing and indescribable love that I have only experienced for 4 months. Selfishly, cry out of fear that my baby will grow up and one day be hurt. I know it will happen. I hope it’s closer to a scraped knee than a car accident.

I worry. I inherited it. My mom worries. My grandma worries. I wonder if I will ever have a day in my life that I don’t spend time worrying about the people I love. Is it simply the fate of a mother? Am I wasting my time when it’s all in the hands of God or the universe or however you want to think of it? I enjoy my life immensely. I may enjoy it even more if I didn’t worry, but I can’t help it. It’s not debilitating, but it does go overboard at times when I dream of the horrible things that might have happened when someone is late or not answering the phone.
As I type this, I realize that this post doesn’t even come close to describing how I felt or, more importantly, how this family felt yesterday. I can’t put it into words. Someone more talented at writing than myself may be able to, but I have my doubts.

I do know this. You have no idea how much your mother loves you until you become one yourself. I would endure any pain or torture to save Ry from it. Without a thought. Gladly. With privilege. It wouldn’t matter what it was, how much it hurt. For him, anything. Even while pregnant I loved him immensely, but it was nothing compared to the feeling that came over me when I held him in my arms. It grows more powerful every day.
How do you describe the love of a mother?

Eternal. Physical. Overwhelming. Soul-deep. Heartbreaking. Ageless. Timeless. Undying. Passionate.
None of those words do it justice.
How do you describe the love of a mother?

I would love to hear it. If you don’t feel comfortable commenting, email me and I will compile them all anonymously into a future post. One word or an essay, it doesn’t matter. I want to know.

How do you describe the love of a mother?

(I later was informed that this post somewhat fits with a request by Her Bad Mother to write about mother love so it will be submitted there to continue it’s journey.)

Ry-guy crawled backward this week!
He can move forward too, but it’s more of a face-skid. He pushes with his feet and slides across his blanket on his face.
My parents’ neighbour made him a beautiful quilt and he (and the dogs and cat so it’s really clean) have spent lots of time crawling around all over it.
I got down to eye level and caught some great shots of him. Here’s a collage I made using flickrtoys. It’s my new addiction. Thanks to chelle for the link. (PS - Go check out her news today!!)

It’s the time of year when I would normally be in my classroom 10 hours a day getting ready for September. I don’t miss it. I have my own teaching and learning to do with my little man. Here are some shots of early literacy at it’s best…

We have had lots of teeting action in the past week. After working up to 11 3/4 hours of sleep at night, last night he went to bed at 10:15, woke up screaming at midnight, nursed back to sleep and then was up at 6:15 am swimming in a puddle of drool. Which, incidentally, is what I did yesterday while at the hospital with my dad. Swam in drool, I mean. He was soaked.all.day. I got this great little vibrating star thingy for him to chew on and he rather enjoys it. It has one drawback, however. He happily chews on it for a minute or two and then, when he pulls it out it is followed by a waterfall of drool that I am never prepared for. Ahh, the joys.